Limiting Beliefs

The last ten years of my life I have had this underlying feeling of “being stuck”. I wasn’t satisfied or fulfilled in most areas of my life. I couldn’t see a path out and was too anxious and basically didn’t believe in myself to take any action to make any real changes. I thought there were only certain types of people who could get a loving relationship or actually make a living doing something they were passionate about. I thought certain people were just lucky and born with confidence and alluring personalities. I told myself I was okay with having a mediocre life. I didn’t dare to let myself dream big because I didn’t believe I was the type of person who could achieve big things. I ended up choosing the path of least resistance and one that would be acceptable to those around me. It’s sad looking back and realizing how little belief in myself I had.

The Voice Inside my Head

My thinking started to change a little over a year ago when I was doom scrolling on tiktok one night and came across a video talking about a book – The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer. Something about the video caught my interest and I ended up ordering the book. Once I started reading it I was immediately pretty mind blown. He talked about how the “voice inside your head” isn’t you. You are the observer of the voice. It made me realize that the voice inside my head was built up of nervous and fearful energies based on past experiences and subconscious beliefs from my childhood and adolescence. Michael Singer wrote that the key to change and peace is done first by noticing the voice inside your head isn’t you. This concept absolutely blew my mind. I had never been taught this before. I had always believed that the voice inside my head was just who I was – anxious, fearful, and limited. 

Changing my Thoughts

With this new information I started to listen and notice the voice inside my head more. What was it saying all day? I started a meditation practice to help start to notice my thoughts and eventually help to quiet that ever active self limiting voice. Once I became aware I made intentions to actively change negative thought patterns to more positive one’s. I started to repeat affirmations everyday – things like “I love myself. I am worthy of love. I am enough. I am confident.” I felt silly at first and didn’t really believe what I was saying, but I kept at it and eventually the words started to feel natural and I slowly but surely started to believe them. I love myself! I am worthy of love! I am enough! I am confident! 

I started to believe that I was capable of more than I had previously thought. I could start dreaming big. I can have a loving relationship. I can make friends. 

It isn’t Easy but it is so Worth it

This change in my life hasn’t been easy. There are days when I slip back into old thought patterns and behaviors. There are days where I feel very uncomfortable because I am showing up differently than how my past self was. It’s been difficult and uncomfortable and scary. Change does not happen overnight, but I have come so far from where I used to be. I have made so many wonderful friends. I have discovered new interests. I can actually say that I truly love myself now. I am so proud of myself!